Is it somewhat hypocritical to write a blog about the fact that you’re not going to write blogs anymore?
It’s been an interesting couple of years for me, to say the least. I made a change from being comfortable in a stable life, around my friends, my family, a good job, my own house, and a relationship, and set off in search of something new. It’s most definitely been a journey of arduous adventure, spontaneity, friends old and new, and learning; about myself, others, and society. I have experienced things I could only have wished for, as well as things I would never wish for again, and through it all, the world keeps turning, so I keep moving!
But what is it all for? I’ve come to start thinking that I’m not appreciating the things I’ve got and the things I’m able to do as much as I should be. Perhaps it’s the age-old theory that you always want what you haven’t got, or perhaps it’s the modern pressures of societal expectancies and social media, but there’s something niggling away at me that doesn’t sit right.
I’ve had the opportunity to travel to many different places, meet all kinds of people, take in views that are experienced only in dreams, and enjoy adventures that I could only have imagined, and it’s been brilliant to document some of this in my blogs, as well as on my travel Instagram. I love getting feedback from my followers about how they find inspiration in what I’m doing, and how they appreciate being able to see a few of the wonderful places I have been through the lens, and yet, when i’m in that moment, watching that sunset from a mountain summit, or hearing the waves crash in below me as I carefully climb up a glorious crag, am I really immersed in it? Am I really appreciating the light breeze that cools my skin on a hot day as I hike across mountainous terrain and undiscovered coves? Do I take the time to sit and enjoy the rare silence when I am away from society? Or do I just focus the camera on getting the best photo with social media anticipation buzzing in the back of my mind? Do I really enjoy those views myself for all they are, or do I view them like all of my followers – through the lens?
I know one day, when I look back on all I’ve done so far, and hopefully all that is yet to come, I’ll be able to remember the little details that can never be described, and the feeling of actually being there, in that moment. So why do I need to write a blog? Did it start off as something for me, and turn into something for everyone else? Why do I need to document everything on social media? I’ll still have all of the memories to call my own, and the photographs saved to share with my loved ones and look back on over time. Sometimes, the nicest thing about the adventure is being totally alone, with no phone signal, no pressures, and time to just feel free.
As I sit and think about this, the concept that’s been niggling away at me for a little while, I decide to give it a go, and set myself free. I have decided that, for now at least, I am going to stop writing blogs, and try to cut down on the amount of social media I use. How many moments have I already missed out on by having my head hung looking at my phone? How many conversations with friends and loved ones have been half-heartedly engaged in because the rest of me is concentrating on something else? These are the moments we can never get back. Of course, it’s fantastic to stay in touch with people, especially when you have friends all over the world, but the most important thing is the here and now, because that’s all we’ve got for certain, isn’t it? So i’m going to try to be more present for the here’s and the now’s, in the hope it fills me with more joy and more gratitude than I’ve ever experienced before.
So! Here’s to the here and now.